Happy Heart Day and Other Bits of Fluff

The stress level at Medieval Woman HQ has been off the charts. So much so that my blood pressure has spiked into "Immediate Stroke" territory. My doctor actually peered at me to see if I was still breathing and asked: "Are you a little jumpy lately?"

"Yes," I replied with eyes bulging.

So, I'm on a host of new meds to help reduce anxiety and bring the blood pressure down into life-sustaining levels. One thing about me - I wear all my emotions on my sleeve. Literally. My body can't hide anything. I would be the worst spy on earth - the first one discovered and dispatched by the enemy. TD was his usual wonderful self and got me a block of 5 massages so I'm going every week for over a month to have her work out the knots in my neck and shoulders (where my legion of stress fiends reside). And I'm eating better.

Why so stressed, you ask?

Because we've now heard that ABSOLUTELY NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING IS WORKING OUT FOR US AGAIN THIS YEAR!!!!!!

The other university that had offered TD the job and was pushing us to make a decision in 20 minutes renegged. Not for funding reasons but because they suck and they got their panties in a wad when we wouldn't capitulate to their ridiculous timeline. (My ninjas have put them in their "black book" of universities who will receive weapons-grade anthrax in their Arbor Day cards this year). We put them off because we were honestly thinking something would work out at the Dream Academy. It was a calculated risk and it backfired, but them's the breaks. I don't regret making that choice and I'm not unhappy about our decision to put them off. However, this does mean that my husband continues to work at a place that will never employ me and that we have to do all of this again next year.

Hence the stress. Put off plans to live together, save money together, have baby together, etc. for god knows how long.

This week has also been the week from hell and it's finally over - woo-hoo! Job candidates have been through and it's now over. I had some extra university work to do this week and it's now over. So, last night I languished at home, cleaned, made chicken burritos, and generally felt great. Today is lunch with friend and then dinner with more friends. Tomorrow is work. Monday is massage morning and margarita night.

I'm looking forward to the summer (who isn't?) because it's going to be very chill. TD will be here for 4 months and I've just had to drop out of a summer conference abroad because I can't afford it - travel funding here is very wonky because of budget issues and I can't afford to pay anything out of pocket this year (not with $3300 in taxes to pay). But, this means that we will:

1) Work lots - I'll finish my book manuscript
2) Go camping frequently
3) Grill many burgers
4) Perhaps go to the beach with J&A

No big trips, no big conferences, no big shakes. Just work and relax.

Ahhhhh....I can feel my blood pressure going down already....

God won't help you either

What follows is an email conversation earlier this semester between Prof. Medieval Woman and Desperate Student (slightly edited):

DS: "Prof. MW, I see that your class is full - is there any way at all you could overload me into the class? I only need this class to graduate and I will be an asset to your class, I promise. This is the only class that fits my full-time work schedule."

Prof. MW: (*looking through 4-5 of these kinds of emails*) "Hi, DS. Sorry, I'm not able to overload into this class at the moment. But, enrollment is fluid early in the semester, so keep checking the online enrollment thingy and if you see a space, grab it!"

DS: (*next day*) "Has anyone dropped the class? Should I come to class on Monday in case anyone isn't there?"

Prof. MW: (*typing with Cheetos fingerprints on the keyboard*) "Not yet, as the online registration to which we all have access indicates to me as of 5 minutes ago. If someone isn't in class on Monday, they haven't necessarily dropped the course, so I advise continuing to monitor the registration online. I myself do not keep a waiting list because of that system. There are already 4-5 students who want into the class and if I let one overload in, I will feel obligated to let all of them in."

DS: "But I really need this class! I appreciate your integrity; it's such a big part of our characters. You seem like such a wonderful educator. I'll be waiting to hear from you."

Prof. MW: (*now banging head against the keyboard in frustration. Cheetos fingerprints now transferred to forehead. Seeing stars. Cheeto-colored stars...*) "Thank you. Unfortunately it really doesn't seem like anyone is dropping the course. My suggestion would be to try to find another course that fits your schedule. Best of luck this semester."

DS: "If you can find it in your heart of hearts to let me in, I would be eternally grateful. Until you do, I'll keep checking back with you and just trust God to find a way."

Prof. MW: "God isn't getting you into this class either. Expect the restraining order to arrive by 5pm today."

A very serious question...

Would you leave your tenure-track position to be with your spouse/partner? Say your partner would always be making twice again as much as you would. After trying to be together for a number of years, would you finally just leave your position and try to adjunct where they are?

Are you ready for the switch?

Thank You!

Belle was her usual lovely self and gave me an Inspiration Award, despite all my bitchin' lately! Thank you so much!

The obligations are those that extend the compliment, which I am delighted to do.

* Please put the logo of the award (above) on your blog if you can make it work with your format.
* Link to the person from whom you received the award.
* Nominate 7 or more blogs.
* Put the links of those blogs on your blog.
* Leave a message on their blogs to tell them.

Hopefully none of you have been nominated yet, but here goes!

heu mihi - who is a wonderful blogger and grad school friend!
Flavia - wearer of awesome shoes, writer of great blog (which got me into blogging), and dispenser of bad-ass-ittude.
Dr. Virago - who crept with me on Welsh battlements and put a new word in my vocabulary: murder-hole.
What Now? - whose transition through many professional and life changes inspires me to keep going and be with the one you love (so you can truly love the one you're with).
Highly Magnified, Thoroughly Educated - whose future transitions from academia into ??? I continue to follow with excitement.
Contemporary Troubador - fellow-commuter and wonderful photographer, my bloggy doppelganger with husband of Lowlands heritage.
Pantagruelle - wonderful French Canadian blogger of whom I hope to read and see more!

Craptastic Day

(*grumble, grumble, grumble..*)

No longer up for a job I was hoping for....

Leverage power reduced....

(*grumble, fume...*)

Just found out that I need to file my taxes "married filing separately" which basically means that my deduction is only slightly greater than the 4 crumbs remaining from my grilled cheese sandwich from lunch....

GODDAMN IRS!

(*grumble, sniff*)

I'm going to have to pay over $3K in taxes this year because of this! TD has no US income and I can't get the married tax deduction without filing jointly and declaring his worldwide income. I called H&R Block and the lady said, "yeah, that's, like, the worst status to file as. You get basically no deduction".

Apparently the government didn't think I was quite aware of how crappy it is not to live with one's spouse. So, they're punishing us further.

Thanks.

Got it.

Random Bits of New Year's Fluff

Wow, it's been a while since I've blogged! We had a wonderful time in Napa and then back to San Francisco for a few days (Alcatraz is fun!). By the time we got home last week I was going stir crazy from living out of a suitcase for 2 weeks. And then the very next day, TD left to go away to Dutchmanlandia, so I sank into a slight depression for a few days realizing that our lovely summer and fall of cohabitation had come to an end.

The job dance continues - one of TD's jobs really wants him and they're looking into a t-t job for me. B/c of this fast-moving opportunity, I've gone to my Chair and Dean and told them the situation. I even wrote up a 3-page memo outlining what they lose if I leave and what they gain by hiring TD. I feel like I gave them good ammo and I really hope something can be worked out. But, I'm actually going to try to remain on an even keel this job season and not count my eggs before they're in the pudding, and so on...so, I won't blog about each little change, but will let you know the outcome eventually.

School starts next Wednesday and I'm sort of prepared - it's all CTs all the time, so it will be fun. Having a hard time getting into work-mode, however.

One of my former colleagues (he's no longer at Dream Academy but was still in town) died suddenly a week or so ago. A very aggressive and swift-moving illness and he was found in his apartment after he'd been sick only a couple days. I didn't know him well, but some friends of mine in the department did and it's very upsetting all the same.

We received 3 cases of wine yesterday from our frolicking in the wine country. I've had to order a wine rack just so we can store it all. But it wasn't nearly as fun opening up the boxes without TD here...

More later!